Facebook, the darling of social media, has brought “friendships” into a new level. You can catch up with friends, share updates about your personal and social life and even get to know total strangers. Six degrees of separation has brought everyone closer and everything you need to know is now available with the click of a mouse. Privacy is fast becoming a rare commodity. Either you have no access to the internet or you choose to remain outside of the radar of the internet revolution. You can’t remain hidden for long and someone somewhere will always look you up.
When you are trying to hide something, it isn’t wise to be flaunting it in front of the whole neighborhood. Awkward questions are sure to be raised and you wouldn’t want the complication of having to explain how a picture of you and your new best friend ended up on the internet looking really cozy and intimate. It’s a one way ticket to divorce proceedings that will take you to the cleaners, angry children in tow.
Becoming the Virtual Cheat
Marital infidelity is an issue for many married couples. The advent of social media has seen a dramatic rise of virtual infidelity where couples can stray due largely to reconnecting with old boyfriends and flirting with total strangers.
According to a study, Facebook is at the root of 20 percent of divorces with 80 percent of divorce lawyers reporting a trend where evidence used involves social media. Terry Real, a marriage counselor believes that Facebook can provide a fantasy for a cheating spouse.
Spouses who are busy paying bills and taking care of the children can sometimes be vulnerable to the fantasy of someone who isn’t available holed up in a fantasy world of the dreamer’s imagination. That lover is always better, richer and fancier. Never mind that everything is an illusion based on appearances. We always covet what we do not have.
Caution, Trouble ahead!
If you are married with a reputation to protect, you should think twice before cheating on your wife. Infidelity has serious repercussions you may not be prepared to face.
If the damage has been done and you are carrying on with your mistress, it is best to take everything into perspective. Your life, your family and reputation are already at stake. Damage control should be foremost in your mind. You can’t complain that you had no idea about what was at stake after everything has been lost. It’s lame. In Fatal Attraction, Michael Douglas’ character really had it coming when he engaged in a casual fling. He thought that it was something he could easily walk away from. He wasn’t banking on his mistress getting clingy and obsessive.
Things have a way of showing themselves when you least expect it. Call it human nature, but people are quick to notice things that are out of the ordinary. If you haven’t been covering your tracks, be prepared to eat sand. Word will get out and make a round of the neighborhood and reach your wife who will surely be giving you a piece of her mind on the breakfast table.
Connections innocently made can start out as platonic friendships that can later turn out into something more, it is certainly something to watch out for.
For the scheming cheater who’s already doing the rounds, the temptation to befriend the mistress should be checked at the door. Remember, you are having a secret love affair. You are not acquiring a second wife. Forget this fine distinction at your risk. . That’s how Eva Longoria discovered that her husband, Tony Parker, was having an affair with a woman he kept in touch through Facebook.
Befriending the mistress on Facebook can mean that you will get to share information about each other. You will have access to each other’s lives, she may post something intimate, that was only meant for your private consumption are high. The missus is sure to find out via mutual friends and private messages and you might as well say goodbye to that rock solid reputation you were building and half of your assets.
Discovery is bound to happen and there is nothing like the stench of a scandal that can get other people’s noses in your business. The smell of the kill can entice morbid curiosity; and yes, we’re not that different from sharks actually.
Since this is social media, if a scandal about your cheating blows over, your entire network will discover who, what, where, when and how details all in real time about how you were such a nincompoop who thinks through his crotch – perfect fodder for the gossip mills and irrefutable evidence for divorce proceedings.