Humans by nature are prone to temptation. We are all likely to have the temptation to cheat at any point in a relationship. A recent study on adultery sought to bring across the idea that a person who knows and feels strongly that adultery is wrong, could cheat nonetheless. This is because the human mind, without strong determination and the power of the will, is weak to the resistance of certain temptations. Even the most resolute of persons can slip every now and again.
If a person believes deeply that cheating is wrong, yet has the lure to do so, what measures can he take to reduce the possibility of him crossing the line? There are many ways and methods that people use to aid in fighting the feelings of infidelity. From research data, we examine the strategies used by many to resist the temptation to cheat.
1. Resist temptation through determination
This is the last thing that many people want to hear. No one actually wants to try hard to resist an innate urge. We want to think that there are quick fix answers for everything, but this is not the case. We have to be realistic. We all have the ability to resist the temptations by sheer strength of will. Our resolve is not without limitations, it can be exhausted by extreme mental and physical efforts. However difficult this is to achieve, it is doable. There are truly no shrewd ways to resist the temptation to cheat. Persons achieve success with their resistance through strong-mind and resilience.
2. Avoidance and flight
Although this is also an obvious strategy to utilize, many persons are negligent to its importance. Just as drug addicts avoid the pharmacy and dieters avoid the pastry shops; so should you avoid situations that could tempt you to cheat. Normally, you just have to avoid one person. Unfortunately, that person might be someone you have to be in constant contact with like a co-worker, a client, customer, neighbor, friend, in-law or even your own relative. In this case, the best option is to avoid being alone with that person. In fact, if you can avoid them in every way possible, do it. Don’t fool yourself into the thought that you can be alone with him or her and everything will be alright. Sometimes we think that we are strong to cover our weaknesses. Avoid the situation in the first place and be honest with your own self.
3. Consider the consequences that might arise
Individuals who commit adultery often fool themselves into believing that the one time they cheat will be the very last time. This is true in some cases, but extremely unlikely for most. People use this notion as a way to vindicate and validate a one time affair. If you want to avoid doing things that you might regret later on then remember the probable lasting consequences of your affair. This should also be inclusive of the harm it causes your spouse and your marriage. You also have to consider the effects an affair will have on your children as well as to your own self-image and reputation. Many people, who give in to temptation once, end up doing it again. Eventually it becomes a routine pattern of lust and deceit. Once a pattern is anticipated and you realize the bad effects that the results of your actions can cause, then you will be more likely to avoid the affair before it starts. In essence, if you do something pleasurable once, you are most likely to do it again. If you avoid the urge to do something once, you are most likely to continue avoiding it.
4. Tell a friend or a relative
If you are having a tremendously difficult time dealing with lusty temptations, seek the support of friends. Social support along with pressure from friends, relative or strangers can be especially helpful in dealing with temptation. Examples of social pressure include Alcoholics Anonymous and Weight Watchers to name a few. However, your genuine friends may genuinely admit their illicit attractions; these people could prove invaluable to your efforts. Ensure that whoever you confide in is trustworthy, a good listener, someone who cares and understands your situation. Whatever it takes, sit and talk to someone about your feelings, be it your friend, relative, pastor, counselor – whoever. Continued conversations will help to motivate you to do the right thing and help to build your will to resist temptations.
5. Open up to your partner
This is the most challenging thing to do when you love and respect someone. It’s no easy task telling them that you are feeling affectionate to someone else. It is better to do this though and let them guide you through the situation than to give in to temptation and cheat. You may not like the outcome, but by doing this, your efforts will not be in vain.